All I Know So Far

There are select people still in my life who have watched my growth with pride and encouragement. I am beyond blessed to have always had their support. That they knew intuitively my motivation was my children. I was desperately seeking how to fix myself and it started with me expecting to find the answers in other people.

All I know so far is that we people please, jump through millions of hoops, and try to meet everyone else’s needs just to get a sliver of the feeling that we belong and are accepted. We don’t do this because we’re some great person with some huge heart. We do it to receive recognition from the ones we love.

Only even if they do show it we are never satisfied. This is because by the time they do we’ve morphed into an inauthentic, watered down version of ourselves, trying to become more acceptable and appealing. The most appealing thing in the world is authenticity and confidence.

What we end up with is resentment that we project and blame them for, but it is we who allow it. It is you who chooses to stay, no matter how many red flags you see waving, and no matter how many boundaries get crossed. We teach people how to treat us and then complain about it.

All I know so far is we spend too much time trying to save other people, as if we will some how earn our own redemption. Every person we try to save is nothing more…